A few days before Halloween, Jeff started a thread titled “I’m dying“. I’ve been following along since then; about noon today, his wife Reta posted an update. Jeff’s moved on to hospice care, with the end expected soon.
I’m no stranger to death. Growing up, it seemed like our family had a funeral a couple times a year. In junior high and high school, we had people check out about once a year. Todd; Brian; Ryan sat in front of a train. My foster sister was murdered. Don. Frank hung himself in ’05. Eric and Kathy. I swore off funerals in 92 when I moved out west; I went to one in 2003 and have regretted the error since.
I’ve certainly seen enough impersonal death. I don’t know Jeff, I’ve never met him, but this is the first death in a long time that’s really bugged me. Don’t know why. Perhaps the protracted nature? It’s no use analyzing it, it bugs me, so I’ll let it bug me until it doesn’t.
No revelation, sorry.
I moved, along with my family, to Moscow, Idaho in 1999. I soon met Lyle and Phil, who told me pretty much the same thing: you should have been here back when Moscow was a thing. I was never really able to understand that until I read some of Dennis Eichhorn‘s comix in Boing Boing. I went to Short Run today to pick up the kickstarter book; I mentioned that his work gave me a glimpse of what Lyle and Phil were on about, and he said, “if you really want to know what Moscow was about, read this!”
I bought pretty much one of everything he had for sale, as well as a huge sheaf of work from Pat Moriarity and a copy of Tom Van Deusen‘s Scorched Earth. I took off to get some food, planning to come back and troll through a second time more carefully; life intervened and I couldn’t make it back.
I will say the Moscow (well, north Idaho, although Moscow is certainly central to the story) of The Legend of Wild Man Fischer is much stranger than I had imagined; I’m quite glad I picked up a copy.
Two cases. Guy isn’t getting interviews with his résumé, I offer to take a look, and it’s bad. I tell him I can see why he isn’t getting interviews, so he argues with me about the superiority of his current résumé format. I ask to see his résumé before he modified it, and it’s better, but has some small stuff in need of changing. I let him know. He argues with me.
Second case. Guy asks specific question about the way to use a software tool to do something. I tell him to look for a button with a certain label. He proceeds to argue with me about what that button does, starting off with “do you know that, or are you guessing?”
In general, I want to help people, but if you want me to help, don’t argue with me.
Some people play the “have a rational discussion about it” game. Some people play the “have an emotional discussion about it” game. These can be the same people on different topics. Other people play a game wherein you roll a set of dice and respond.
You have to know which game you’re playing to understand the rules. If you’re playing either of the first two games against someone playing the third, you’re going to have am impedance mismatch and they’ll never know.